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Saturday, April 9, 2011

Late Night Ramblings, and Other Words

Good golly! Time has flown, lent is nearly over and Holy Week is practically upon us. Well, that will be what I notice on my deathbed...life is what happens when you are making other plans...so true! I keep thinking of all the things I will do and people I will see, but really the years flit by. Katherine was all over the fish we had for Annunciation, she even ate it as a bedtime snack. She has done so well during this fast, she doesn't even ask for meat, though she has mentioned bacon once or twice. Ha ha!

It's late, I am awake, but should be sleeping. I should be going to bed, reading the psalms, but I am tired without actually feeling tired, if that makes any sense at all. I have always been more of a night owl, I take after my dad in that respect. I have decided that since it is quieter in the evenings, when most people are asleep, I find the most peace and I can think. I can't remember a time that it wasn't so.

So far, being 33 has its perks. I like being a grown up, though I could do without the mortality flashes when I realize this body is so fleeting, but hey, it isn't all bad. Maybe that is just because I need to remember death, that it should be before me at all times. I have the concept in my head yet, in practice, I am definitely lacking. In certain moments, I notice I am able to hone in on the proper focus, then is filters through my fingers like grains of sand. *sigh* I do like the gaining of some wisdom, if you can call it that. I have always admired people who were able to say what they ought to in the right moment and I think I may have gotten the hang of some of it after 33 years! Whew! What will I glean after the next 33?

Katherine is as big, smart, strong and sweet as ever. We had a go-go-go day on wednesday and were out the door for the vigil of Annunciation and I hadn't even tried to help her get her confession list together, if she was planning to go. On our way, about 5 miles from home, she says, "Mom, I want to have confession tonight." As she flipped through pages of my little notepad from my purse finding a clean page, I thought about how much it seems she has grown in the past 7 months since turning 7.

She is funny and loving, though a little wound up at times, but who isn't? She has her own style, which is a little funky, fun and sober, all at the same time. I know, kin of a strange combo of descriptors. Today we were looking at doll patterns from Meema that are so vintage! Katherine decided on the nightgown for her Felicity doll and I told her I thought she preferred a different dress. Her response, I thought, was rather mature because she told me that the only thing she didn't like was that none of the dresses went to the knee, or lower. You see, in our house, we don't wear skirts or dresses shorter than the knee and I thought it was interesting for her to take note of this when it concerns a doll. She amazes me in ways I never thought could touch my heart, but they always find a way in. Some might say that is minor, but not when you are this mom.

We had to sell Leafa, the Westfalia, much to our dismay, she has served us well. Jay was so good about working on that van and we got to travel across the country to some great places, but it was time to say goodbye. With gas prices the way they are going, it wasn't practical to keep it. She went to a good home, so that is comforting. Katherine got all choked up as we watch the new owner get in and drive off, poor thing. I think that girl would have lived in that van, given the chance. C'est la vie!

Well, it is certainly late enough, so I will sign off, for now. The morning will be here sooner than I care to imagine and I have sewing to work on, a girl to hang around with, husband to chat with, sun to absorb...oh, the list never ends, but I don't know if I would want it to. Later!

PS-I am excited to see my big sis on our way to the wedding in a little more than a week!

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