I Will Think of You

When you are gone
The birds will come
With memories of today
Lit upon their wings
And I will think of you

Many days will pass
But I will remember you
When the birds come
Bearing the gift of sweet reverie
And I will think of you

There will be a time
When the call will be undeniable
I will hear the voice of Eternity
I will heed its call
And I will think of you

When I am gone
Birds will visit where I lie
Perhaps find someone to remind
Of the days we have had
And they will think of me

Heart of Hearts

Break open your heart
Let in all love and light
Adorn the walls therein
Covering all with prayer
Seek peace and simplicity
Open wide the windows
Welcome the change and flow
Unlatch your heart's door
Gentle kindness awaits
Eager anticipation wins
While contentedly we watch
He brings unity, peace, and love
In Grace

Thought on Veteran's Day

Ah, Veteran's day. A day to remember veterans, their service, their sacrifice, and whatever else that arises. On the flip side, those of us connected to service members who have served to the extent that they have been compromised, broken, or even lost to us, it is bittersweet. It is a great thing to honor them, but for many, it is a reminder of what has come to pass, which taints memories. The plans that had been made, dreams that were imagined, become but dust and a wisp of a thought.

When I think of my veteran, I appreciate his sacrifice, without a doubt. When I think of other veterans, I appreciate the same, but I am closer to the families that laid out their entire existence to be apart, the present they sacrifice (and continue to do), plus the future that may not come to pass, and how their worlds will more than likely be shifted upon the return of their soldiers.

When someone thanks my husband for his service, I am grateful they think of him and his willingness to stand and fight. I would be remiss if I did not also mention that it also feels so empty, since not all will truly know the reality of seeing someone off to war and having someone else return in their body. In my world, every day is veteran's day, because I have no choice but to live with what war does to people and has done to my husband and our family. This is a centuries old predicament that permeates all people in all places and so I feel for all generations and families, near and far.

This veteran's day, I implore you to consider that, although a veteran's countenance may appear average, the inner workings are almost always churning and they must live with what they have left, which sometimes is precious little compared to what might have been. Compassion is something they cannot live without and their families deserve a big hug, even if only in prayer and spirit. Remember the veteran, remember the families, remember the lessons, and continue with love and understanding.

Shifting

The weather has finally begun to reflect the season which is now upon us. The gray hues in the sky provide a stark contrast for the bright leaves still clinging to the trees. It is my most favorite, as it slows me to the pace I find the most peace. Productive, without overactivity, and contemplative, with enough time for proper thought. I ought not be anywhere as changing of the seasons, but they have always had a way of shifting my energy and focus into one so decidedly theirs.

I love the stillness that comes with the cooling and darkening of the year. It never fails to amaze me how the trees and creatures flow so knowingly along with each passing day as the days change. When the cold sets in is when we see the staunch and sturdy beauty this Creation truly has in store. It is almost as though we are privileged enough to have a peek into the foundation of strength and eternity which lies beneath all that we see. To perceive with sight is a gift, indeed, but to sense the thread that binds the present with eternity is most certainly a blessing, without question.

Glory to God for all things! Blessed Autumn to all!

Biking, How Do I Love Thee?

I have a great bike, her name is Samantha. Yes, I named my bike. She is a Trek 1.5 road bike and my first true love that makes me want to ride and ride. I got this bike about 6 years ago, I think, so she's got all the bells and whistles. I believe the following year the models did not have the same high-end bits and whatnot.

Since adding my odometer, I have ridden about 460 miles, minus this past year, when I did not ride her once *sad face*. Now that we are in town, I fully expect to add a ton more miles, since that will be my main mode of transport, aside from walking. Today was the first day in over a year since hopping on that bike and riding to town. I had forgotten all the reasons I own that bike. I feel free, effortless, and content. No other bike has been so comfortable and fit me like a glove--ever.

We, as a family, are moving toward being as car-free as possible for a number of reasons, so we will all be on foot and bike in the coming weeks, months, and hopefully, years! All our bikes still fit us well, and we even got a tow behind kid trailer for Miss Mini Mae to ride in on all of our adventures!

I know some of this seems silly, but precious little in this world fits me and offers so much. I am neither petite or regular, so everything is either too big or too small, except this bike... All for now, I just enjoy my bike on so many levels and wanted to share.

Lord, Have Mercy

Dave is gone, not from our thoughts, but from our lives. How can they be so very different? Our hearts contain him, our words and daily interactions reflect him, but he isn't here to weigh in on the obvious.

I sit here listening to his Counting Crows CD, August and Everything After; I borrowed it, what seems like, so many lifetimes ago as a kid, but Andrea gave it to me after his passing recently. The thread that is drawn from each moment that glides through years becomes ingrained like a piece of ourselves we don't see until it slips away. Gone. A whisper in the wind.

Everything and nothing is lost. Dave's person is gone, but he is with each of us in all that we do. Where did the time go, why was it so fleeting? God alone knows the answer and I am still learning Truth.

O have come to understand, through this bit of life that hangs so close to my own, that whatever we do effects those around us, regardless of how minute it may seem. The ripple is in effect, from the embrace of a simple hug, to the glance carrying contempt. Things may seem to progress into a non-sequential rhythm of life, but all is connected, there is no escape from it.

Be aware, be awake, to the ways that touch or harm one another, no matter where on this globe we stand, we effect the others' lives. I will never believe differently. May Dave rest in peace, being kept in God's mercy, love, and compassion. I weep for the earthly loss, but trust in His omnipotence.

Spiced Pumpkin Custard

I just made something similar to this recipe, but the one below is how I would modify what I made. YUM!

2 1/2 cups fresh pumpkin, pureed
1 can coconut milk (full fat)
6 large eggs
Combine all in food processor, empty into a bowl.
Add:
2 T Pumpkin pie spice
2 tsp salt
4 tsp vanilla
1 cup pure maple syrup

Whisk all together and measure equally into 2 pie plates. Zest fresh orange peel onto the tops. I put a dish in the oven with water to keep humidity up. 350 degrees, 40-50 mins.