Thursday, July 28, 2011

Something From the Coffee Shop

Here I go trying to write more blogs to be updated from time to time. Let's see, July is winding up into a neat end to the busy month in true style. Katherine is completing her art camp today, which she really enjoys. She is the kid who meshes with almost every situation, so long as she relaxes. If she isn't comfortable, she is a force to be reckoned with. I have always thought it best to trust her personal instincts and allow her to develop them in a natural fashion. If she doesn't want to say hello to someone she doesn't know, or chooses not to hug someone, I won't force her. It is different if she is just being shy and doesn't want to be in the middle of attention, but I have come to recognize the difference after nearly 8 years.

I think it is rather healthy for her to be able to strengthen her intuitive response, because if she learns to do this as she grows, she may find that she listens to that gut feeling when she is in a situation when she is older and be able to know how to handle herself. Learning Kung Fu will probably help in that respect and I think her Papa is pleased that she has chosen to take Kung Fu. I am sure this will allay some of his fears for her being a very pretty girl, who is slight of build and social with boys and girls alike. He knows that his biggest job is to be the measure for all men in her life, which is a tall order, but she has already come to him to ask his opinion of a boy that she sort of liked. I think that speaks volumes! She went to him to be sure that her Papa approves of and even likes boys that she is interested in.

I think it is important for dad's to 'date' their daughters. In this respect, the girls will come to understand what a date should be. For Kat and her Papa, they have a special meal and watch a movie together, sometimes they play a game. It is all appropriate and she will grow up with the idea that this is a normal date, I think. She has already become accustomed to having her weekly dates with her Papa and she is hard-pressed to give that up. In fact, even if I haven't got anything to do, I had better find something so they can have their time. I think their time together will also model for her what sort of marriage she should work for when she is old enough. I know she is only nearly 8, but if I am not thinking about these things now, I will just get lost in the shuffle and her entire life will pass me by.

I remember when she was small, having a deep-seeded hope that she might seek to become a monastic, but she is like her mom, who always liked the nuns and monks, but longed for a husband and family from a very young age. It would be silly of me to try to direct her somewhere she isn't headed on her path. If I am truly a believer that God directs our steps, then I have to be confident that my job is simply to guide her, give her boundaries and take her to church, the rest will come. I do believe there is effort to be made, but I also believe that no matter how we try to force ourselves, or others, into a slot where we don't belong, the dominant course seems to always push through. Who we are at the core and how we function and relate, it will find its way to the path where it belongs. In short, each persons path is their own and will be directed in whatever manner is beneficial for each of us, with or without our interference. It doesn't mean we can have influence and participate, but to try to make anyone to do anything only creates resentment and pain.

Alright, well, only a couple hours left for Kat at art camp and a friend I haven't seen in FOREVER is meeting me for coffee, hurray! So, I am going to go for now.


Mary said...

I think it's wonderful that Katherine has "date night" with her dad!! I totally agree with your thinking!