In the book I am reading by St. John of Krondstadt, there is a portion which struck a chord. It discusses early on how we must prepare ourselves to be firm in our convictions when we ask anything of God. We must be bold and unwavering, knowing that everything seen and unseen, possible and seemingly impossible, are all in the realm of God's omnipotence. I found myself realizing how little faith I possess, no matter my thoughts on the subject, and have thought, "And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief." (Mark 9:24, KJV) My heart has been weak, but "...he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me." (2 COR 12:9, KJV) In this weakness and these trials I have come to learn the faintness of my own heart, the changeable nature which I perpetuate, but it is glorious, because in my understanding, I have peace, hope, direction, and clarity!
"It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found." (Luke 15:32, KJV) I feel just like this in many ways of my being, that I have been renewed, yet again, by God's grace, love, glory, and teachings. Just when I have thought it was exhausting to be in this life, to be dragging myself around from time to time, day in and out, God has shown me much mercy and comfort! If could tell you what awaits a person who stays the course of the fast and how the feast day is magnified in the heart and soul, you would never fall away and would always choose to be close to God. By no means do I have any perfection in me, but the growth and life of my every fiber is held up and made whole by the God of love, peace, joy, and all things that make the heart shine in unceasing gratefulness and plentitude.
May you all be so blessed as to know the utter existence of the King of Peace. Love to you all and happy feast of St. Seraphim of Sarov (o.s.)! (Please know that I was writing this in some haste, so if you would kindly forgive any clerical errors, I would appreciate it.)
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Spiritual Revelation and Peacefulness
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